A Brotherly Affair.

Assalamualaikum and hello everyone.

It has been such a long time, I know. I haven't done any ramblings for quite some time, for so long that I personally feel obligated to do so and within this period of hiatus of mine, lots of things and event had occurred that I need to tell and elaborate. The one that brings to my attention right now is my own brother.

yes, I'm not going to ramble about Adelaide in this post, nor about the beautiful jacaranda trees that often bloom around this time which didn't bloom much this year, and again not about the lovely and warming atmosphere that the summer always bring with it during this time. For I think, little do I create a post to cherish the important persons in my life.

A brother. Yes, that brother (for my case, that one brother) who we always have this kind of love-hate relationship with. Yes, the one you'd hate him when he's there, but remembers him fondly whenever he's not. The one who cares for you whenever you're not looking and the one who picks on you as a way to show their affection and love as a brother. Well, my brother is kinda like that, and I have no objection with that as long as I have ways to show him my way of saying 'thanks'. But then again, let's face it, we all have brothers like that, (for people who do have a brother in their life) and its just their way as showing their love and affection. If you remembered my post about the love of dads, then this post will be about brothers around the globe which I specially dedicate it to my brother.

A brother is the one part of your life that sometimes you wished you could have it changed whenever he picked on you and you ran to your parents for help and yet he won against you, leaving you feeling miserable for yourself. A brother is also the one part of your life that you wish he would stay like that forever, especially when sticks up for you against your parents, despite knowing that you are responsible for the whatever wrong doings you just did and also for sticking up to the bullies because only he can bully you without you getting hurt that much. He did that for the fact he's responsible for being the protective brother and sometimes you can't deny it that you'll respect him just that much for doing such a little task.

A brother is this miniature set of the fathers. Why would I say so? Well, a father rarely shows their emotions to anyone except their wife and especially to their children. A brother is similar in the way that they rarely show to their little siblings that they care but deep down inside, their protective nature as a brother will always be there to protect and help you whenever he sees fit. A brother thinks that he acts second in command after the father, whenever the father is away, he will step up to the plate and acts behalf of the father. He's the one to quarrel a lot with since he's the closest thing to authority (meaning your parents), preventing you from getting otherwise whatever you want, which without the present of the same authority, you could do so. So this is what a brother is like to me.

A brother could be the closest friend you have, yet you'll often took it for granted and he doesn't mind you for doing so.

I'd hate it especially when someone could have a peek to what I was thinking. Hate is a rough word I know, maybe a little bit of discomfort would suffice. Regardless, I always think that no one will be able to do so, read what I was thinking since I rarely talk to people what I really was thinking, but my brother seems to have this inevitably annoying talent to read my mind. One that really came to mind was when I was having a car ride with him, me at the passenger seat while he was driving. I can't remember the details but somehow I was feeling annoyed about something so I remained silent for the whole trip. Somehow, my brother could muster his courage and asked me why do I remained silent? He asked again whether it was about what had happened just now?

I remained silent despite the fact that he hits me like an archer hitting the bulls-eye.

Deep down I know he cared, so that's why he bothered asking me. If he doesn't then the whole journey would be a silent march, even though the journey wasn't taking that long.

This protective nature of my brother had shine long before I've realised how important a brother could be to you.

When I was around 3-4 years old, I could remember asking my sister, Kak Ifa for some water as I was really thirsty and there's no one older than her around when I asked this. All that I could remember was that she replied that she was busy and what could possibly a 10 year old girl be busy with at that time, I don't really know but that was her answer, haha. Obviously I couldn't ask my brother since he wasn't that tall to do so as the kitchen cabinet was rather high at that time (from a perspective of a little child). So feeling a little bit of despair, I scramble through the kitchen drawer, took out my favourite green cup and went out of the house. Being a little bit of an adventurous person back then, I went around the house, finding little sources of water I could find.

DO NOT DO THIS AT HOME OR ANYWHERE ELSE, UNLESS YOU'RE A KID AND YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING OR THINKING.

I've found myself some drain water which the source of the water is rather questionable since it came from the kitchen sink. So being innocent little me, I scooped out some water and look deep down inside the cup. It's crystal clear, nothing to be worried of I'd say. Just when the cup was about to touch the subtle lips of mine, my brother came to the rescue.

'Hey, you don't drink that!'

He took the cup away from me. The truth was, he was watching every single action that I was doing and was waiting for the right time to come and stop me. Then he took me by the hand, took me to my sister who was watching the tv (so, this was what she was busy doing eh?... haha) and single-handedly put the blame back on my sister for not pouring some water for me, which she guiltily did so afterwards.

So what really made me think of him after all? I don't really know. It's just in the nature of little brothers being grateful to their elder siblings I guess?

Regardless, I would like to say all the best to my brother who have just graduated as an engineer. May Allah swt bless you always on your journey. This long road that we both know and have taken would be full of trials and challenges but despite all that we know that there will be no one else out there that would carry our dreams and responsibility as a daie if we don't do it ourselves.

p/s: All the best, my brother and close friend :)

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Of Showering Loves and What Nots.

Here lies the story of me and my father, which I find it rather difficult to grasp since I left it at the back most shelf within the library of memories in my brain. The neuron located at my temporal lobe sparks, in the hopes that these memories could be obtained without any disdain. I wonder how many of us could recall the sweetness of our memories with our fathers? Is it true, if I were to say that throughout the globe, a father is stereotypically the same? I wonder that sometimes.

I know fathers are the less talking bunch compared to mothers. I know that they looked less emotional, or rather not show anything at all to their children, giving out the notion that, they are somewhat superior like a dictator, governing their very own comfy miniature castles. They do care, but reluctant to show, for what others said it to be, "let actions do the talking". I know they worked their body in the day, enduring strains of hardship and headache to ensure that there's food on the table for dinner each night. How about your branded nike sports shoes, your branded back pack, and all the showering of gifts and stuffs so that you will be accepted among the materialistic peers of yours? Wouldn't that cost you MONEY? Who gave it to you? Your father? Then who gave it to him then? Obviously he worked hard for you and your family.

But then again, I am no father. I know what I know by observing the other fathers. How is it that they are typical, I can't describe it clearly either. But one thing I can tell you is that I know my father is different, despite having most of the criteria of being the stereotype fathers.

For my father have the talent to arrange flowers and other decorations, which is rare skill for a man. Most of the flowers in my house, now slowly deteriorating due to the small but mischievous hands of my nephew and niece, are personally arranged by my father. I even remembered that, he used to arrange that special bunch of flowers for my sisters weddings. You know, the flowers that you put on the table, where the married couple is eating. Well, that's my father for you.

I often thought my father seldom shows that he cares, and looking back as I grew older, I am assured that I am wrong all these years.

When I was 15 years old, I remembered it was the time for the PMR paper. The night before the science subject, my 'old friend' got to me in my bedroom. I was wheezing and having all sorts of difficulties in breathing. It was asthma. Usually, a puff or two from the inhaler would suffice and the soothing effect of the medicine lingering in my esophagus will put me back to being calm and sleep it off once again. But this time, those puffs would just not do the trick. I also remembered that it was the fasting month, and I could not fast for that day, for the fact that my father told me to eat the medicine, or I will never get to seat for the exam.

So that morning, my father and my mother took the day off from work and sent me to school. So here I went into the exam hall, answering bits of everything that I could. One thing you must know about asthmatic pills is that they are one of the powerful medicines created ever. What I meant by powerful is not the effect of relieving the asthmatic symptoms, but the side effects that it carries with it. My hands were trembling for no reason, like someone who's suffering from Parkinson. I can barely write with my hands. I tried to stop my right hand from shaking using my left hand, but what's the use, both hands were shaking. Its not that it shook so hard like someone drilling the cement floor, but the effect's still there and quite noticeable too.

And when the exam's finished, I went straight to our car.

"How was it?" my father asked, his eyes looked concern. I knew he knew about the medicine side effects.

"It was okay, but it was somewhat difficult for me to write just now." I replied, taking my seat at the back.

"I am sorry, I should have told you about the effects." my father briefly replied.

"It's okay, there nothing I can't handle."  reassuring my father firmly so that he did not have to feel guilty.

(but I did ace my science subject.. :-) )

Why do I remember this most?

I just came to realise, my parents ditch their work for me. They stayed throughout the whole exam period for that particular day. Was it 1 hour, or 2? I don't know and it doesn't matter to me anymore. What matters now is that how my parents waited for me back then when I was sick. I never thought that they would do that you know, not saying that my parents are workaholic or anything but it was really reassuring to have them by your side when you are at your weakest moment.

For those who treat their parents like ATM machines, know that those 'ATM machines' of yours worked hard all day long, just to make sure there's gonna be food for the whole family. I learned this when I started working. I know its not much if compared to my parents, but it's still tiring so just to earn money. Thus reality, how cruel it maybe, slaps me hard on the face that its hard to earn money, but regardless it's easy to spent them. So, for those who still gonna treat their parents like ATM machines, know that your parents think highly of you and wants the best for you. Its just plain wrong in my view if you can't reciprocate in any form at all, let it be educational, sports or even anything that gives your parents something to be proud of.

And, remember. This is not a post about fathers on fathers day. Its a post about fathers day being an everyday thing.

For what it's worth, lets make our parents smile again, and let it stay that way. :)

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tali kasut

“Ayah!”

Pintu bilik Encik Ghazali dibuka pantas tapi kemas, seolah-olah orang yang membukanya tahu-tahu supaya tidak terhentuk dinding bercatkan warna kuning cair itu. Bukan apa, takut catnya terkeluar.

Seorang remaja meluru masuk, lalu segera melabuhkan punggungnya di tepian katil. Mukanya berkerut sejuta makna.

Encik Ghazali yang sedang membelek surat khabar terdiam. Dia seolah-olah tidak mengedahkan ribut taufan yang berlabuh bersama. Ternyata dia sudah masak dengan perangai anak bongsunya itu. Manja dan keras kepala.

“Ayah!” remaja itu kembali bersuara.

“Kenapa ni Adam? Adam nak apa?” Encik Ghazali menjawab. Dia yakin kali ini, halnya mesti bersangkut paut dengan abangnya, Shahrul.

“Adik mahukan kasut macam Abang. Ala, tak mahu strap-on. Nak ikat dengan tali punya!” Adam membahasakan dirinya adik. Nadanya bangga. Dia bangun lalu mendapatkan ayahnya di meja bacaan.

“Kenapa baru sekarang nak bising? Lagipun Adam bukannya tahu ikat tali kasut pun.” Encik Ghazali menjawab tenang. Dia tahu tidak akan termakan oleh si anak mendengar jawapannya ini. Adam pantang melihat  si Shahrul lebih, pasti dia mahukan juga. Jaraknya tidak jauh, 2 tahun saja.

“Ala, satu kelas pakai kasut ikat dengan tali tau. Adam sorang je tak.” nadanya perlahan. Tunduk mukanya merah padam. Tangannya digenggam erat di sisi.

Encik Ghazali menutup lembaran surat khabar lalu menatap anaknya itu. Taktik lama tapi berkesan. Anak muda remaja sekarang, tambah-tambah si bongsu. Haih. Encik Ghazali mengeluh kecil. Bilakah kau mahu matang, walaupun sedikit?

“Satu syarat!”

Adam segera mengangkat mukanya. Senyuman terukir lebar tanda gembira protesnya berjaya.

“Ikat tali kasut sendiri. Jangan mintak tolong Ayah, Emak, Kak Ara, Kak Ida, dengan Abang. Paham?” Encik Ghazali memandang tepat ke arah mata anak bongsunya itu. Matanya keras tapi penuh penghayatan kasih dan sayang.

“Baik ayah!” Matanya membulat. Permintaannya terlaksana. Adam segera keluar dari bilik itu, mukanya gembira tak terkata. Akhirnya, dia dapat juga merasakan memakai kasut sekolah bertali. Selepas ini, Abu, Ahmad, Raju dan Mei Chia pasti tidak boleh ketawakan dia lagi.

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Waktu rehat di Sekolah Menengah River Free Jones

“Hahaha! Apa ni Adam?” bentak Abu.

“Ini ke cara kau ikat tali itu Adam?” Raju bertanya, sindirnya tajam.

Mei Chia memandang ke arah kasut itu. Tangannya tidak lepas dari menunjuk kesilapan besar si Adam.

“Mana ada orang ikat tali tu macam ikat bungkusan nasi lemak Adam!” Ahmad ketawa berdekah-dekah. Dia tidak dapat bertahan lagi.

Mereka ketawa besar. Muka Adam merah menyala. Dia sungguhnya malu tak terkira.

“Tapi aku cuma nak..” Adam cuba menjawab.

“Lain kali, kalau tak tahu, jangan buat-buat pandai!” Abu melawan kembali.

Pengkhianatan. Tanpa berlengah lagi, dia mengangkat langkah. Langkahnya seribu, malu jika lebih ramai melihat kebodohonnya itu. Satu tempat dia boleh bergantung, si Shahrul.

“Kenapa kau ikat camni Adam? Mana ada orang lilit tali kasut tu!” Shahrul tersengih. Tangannya segera cuba meleraikan ikatan mudah dibuat oleh adiknya itu. Sayangnya pada si Adik, biarlah si Adik tertanya-tanya.

“Adam, nak berdikari! Adam tak nak lagi pakai kasut strap-on. Budak-budak je pakai kasut macam tu!” Matanya merah menahan linangan air mata. Dadanya naik turun menahan sebak. Marahnya hanyalah pada diri sendiri, cuba matang akhirnya memperbodohkan diri sendiri.

Shahrul selesai mengikat kemas tali kasut Adam. Dia bangun lantas tersengih melihat keadaan adiknya itu.

“Balik nanti Abang ajar ikat kasut nak?” Shahrul cuba memujuk.

“Baik!” Adam menjawab segera. Dia tersenyum cuba untuk berterima kasih. Dia pun lantas beredar dari koridor tingkatan 3 itu.

Shahrul berdiri tegak di situ melihat si Adam berjalan perlahan menjauhi blok akademik. Dia diam memikirkan sesuatu.

Rupanya, Adam sudahpun mulai matang.

P/s: It’s okay to make mistakes and grow out from it :)

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malangnya metafora: kapitel 2

Emerald tersentak dari lamunannya. Ketukan kecil di tingkapnya membuat harapannya menggunung semula. Semestinya dia telah menunggu kehadiran seseorang sejak dari makan malam lagi. Dia bingkas bangun lalu tangannya segera mencapai tingkap. Dia tersenyum, tapi senyuman itu tidak kekal lama.

"Neil, sudah berapa kali ku bilang, jangan sesekali mendekati tingkap ini!" Emerald membentak. Matanya membulat tanda protes terhadap tindakan anak muda itu cuba memasuki biliknya melalui tingkap itu.

Pemuda berambut coklat itu tersengih melihat Emerald yang sedang marah. Dia tahu benar bahawa Emerald tidak sukakan perbuatannya itu. Dia segera mengundur diri lalu mengambil tempat di salah satu dahan besar yang betul-betul berhadapan dengan tingkap bilik Emerald. Kakinya diayunkan sambil menyambung sengihannya itu.

"Aku amat keliru dengan kau Emerald." Neil bersuara, memecahkan sunyi di Hafestord Street. Kali ini, dia tersenyum lebar pula.

"Maksud kau Neil?" Emerald bingung. Dia tahu soalan yang ditujukan oleh Neil bukan bermaksud sedemikian, tetapi hatinya masih mahukan penjelasan dari pemuda itu.

"Maksud aku, adakah kau benar-benar orang Jordbro? Tengoklah pemuda-pemudi di sini. Bebas tanpa batasan mahupun sekatan. Mereka bebas berbuat apa sahaja antara mereka. Tengoklah, masih ada yang baru pulang dari bersuka ria dia kelab-kelab malam." Neil diam seketika. Dia mahu mesejnya sampai ke Emerald dengan cara yang lembut sekali.

"Tetapi berbeza bagi kau Emerald. Kau berlainan. Kau menjaga hubungan antara lelaki dan perempuan. Kau menjaga dirimu seperti menjaga intan permata yang tidak ternilai harganya. Kau istimewa di Jordbro. Kerana kau adalah kau." Neil menghabiskan hujahnya.

"Oh. Itu maksudmu? Jika begitu, aku berbeza kerana aku mempunyai prinsip kehidupanku tersendiri. Biarlah mereka leka dan lalai dengan dunia mereka. Aku bukanlah gadis stereotaip kerana akulah gadis termuda dapat menyertai program MEASTRAF. Jika berbeza bagimu adalah berbeza bagiku, maka tidak sehaluanlah pendapat kita." Emerald menjawab dengan penuh keyakinan.

Dia tahu dia berlainan dari remaja cliche yang sering menghabiskan masa mereka melakukan aktiviti liar lagi tidak terkawal. Semua ini adalah berkat ajaran dan didikan awal dari ibu dan ayahnya, Emily Terrysiff, dan Joshua Terrysiff. Merekalah yang mendidiknya supaya memegang teguh kepada prinsip yang betul. Mereka jugalah yang menyelia aktiviti harian anak-anak mereka. Semestinya semua ibu bapa mahukan yang terbaik bagi anak-anak mereka.

"Maafkan aku jika membuatkan kau terasa." Neil membalas. Dia berasa sedikit serba salah kerana membangkit isu remeh itu.

"Tidak perlu, aku sedikit pun tidak tersinggung sama sekali." Emerald menjawab segera. Dia tersenyum melihat Neil yang berada dalam keadaan serba salah. Dia melihat jam di dinding. Hampir pukul 3 pagi.

"Neil, beginilah, aku ada hajat untuk diminta dari kau, wahai sahabat." Emerald menyambung semula perbualan.

"Aku akan tunaikan selagi yang termampu." Neil menjawab segera.

"Begini, aku mahu kau tengok-tengokkan keluarga ku ini." Emerald menjawab dan kembali bisu. Dia seolah-olah sedang memikirkan apa yang harus dikatakannya supaya tidak di salah ertikan oleh Neil.

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malangnya metafora : kapitel 1

Malam di suburb Jordbro tenang, awannya jarang-jarang, dan langit dipenuhi bintang terang. Lampu-lampu jalan menerangi Hafestord Street. Emerald sedang mengamati kawasan perumahannya dengan penuh kusyuk melalui tingkap bilik kecilnya itu. Sunyi tanpa sebarang aktiviti manusia. Dia seperti kelihatannya resah. Berulangkali dia menyemak jam tangannya.

“Sudah 2 pagi kah?” tanya Emerald bersendirian seolah-olah pertanyaan itu dibuat kepada orang lain.

Gadis kecil itu melihat kembali keluar tingkap. Harapannya palsu semata-mata. Mana mungkin selewat pagi ini Neil akan datang melawatnya. Beberapa buah kereta menyusul di Hafestord Street. Mungkin pemuda-pemuda Jordbro baru pulang dari kota Stamford. Parti lewat malam merupakan kebiasaan kepada para remaja, terutamanya mereka yang tinggal di kota.

Emerald bangun dari tempat duduknya yang berhampiran dengan tingkap lalu membaringkan dirinya di atas katilnya yang diperbuat daripada oak merah itu. Matanya berkelip perlahan. Dahinya berkerut memikirkan temannya yang masih belum muncul-muncul itu.

Esok merupakan hari terakhir Emerald di Jordbro, dan semestinya hatinya bercampur-baur. Gembira. Teruja. Sedih. Resah. Anak sulung keluarga Terrysif itu terpaku seketika. Hatinya bergelora bagaikan dilanda taufan.

Program Teknologi Pesat MEASTRAF.

Program angkasawan di tahap antarabangsa yang diadakan secara besar-besaran untuk mencari ahli untuk ekspidisi pencarian planet baru untuk didiami oleh manusia sejagat. Umpama mimpi. Realitinya tidak jauh dari genggaman manusia.

Manusia jika mahukan ulat menjadi ular, tidak perlu tunggunya keajaiban. Mereka sudahpun melanggar hukum alam ini, dan juga terlalu lama mereka merosakkan keseimbangan dunia. Maka haruslah yang lain menjadi mangsanya walaupun tidak tahu sebarang angkara.

Ketika matanya mulai lelap, tingkap di bilik kecilnya diketuk kuat.

P/s: Huh. :)

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malangnya metafora : epilog

"Lama lagikah eksplorasi kita di sini Kapten?" ujar Emerald, matanya berpinar-pinar inginkan kebenaran. Dia seolah-olah tahu bahawa eksplorasi mereka ke planet Marikh ini seperti ada sesuatu yang tidak kena.

Kapten Richard terdiam. Dia berasa serba salah. Haruskah pengkhabaran yang sebenar dari pihak atasan perlu dirungkai kepada gadis molek itu?

"Kapten, kapten?" Emerald memanggil seraya tangannya memegang bahu Kapten Richard.

Kapten Richard yang tersentak dari lamunannya lalu berkata,"Emerald, sesungguhnya banyak perkara yang tidak kena pada ekspedisi kali ini." Matanya melirik jauh dari tujahan pandangan Emerald.

Diam. Sunyi. Lengang seketika. Hanya bunyi dari mesin pengiraan statik masa dan ruang berfungsi menjalankan kerja mereka.

"Sebenarnya, pihak atasan mahukan kita memanjangkan lagi tempoh ekspedisi ini, walaupun mereka sedar akan risiko yang terpaksa kita harungi." Kapten Richard kembali bersuara memecah sunyi di bilik operasi itu.

Emerald membisu. Dadanya sebak penuh resah. Dia mengalihkan pandangannya ke arah skrin komputer riba di hadapannya. Matanya yang biru cair itu kelihatannya berkaca. Seluruh pelosok mindanya telah terbang jauh ke planet Bumi yang dicintainya dahulu suatu ketika. Adakah ayah dan ibunya sihat? Persoalan demi persoalan pun tiba di benak fikiran gadis Stokholm itu. Jordbro. Tempat tinggalnya suatu masa dahulu. Ingatannya penuh dengan bait-bait indah di Jordbro. Penempatan suburb itu tidak lekang dengan suara tawa kanak-kanak.

Benar. Suatu masa dahulu. 10 tahun yang lalu, bumi Stockholm merupakan tempat terindah bagi Emerald.

Kini semuanya hanyalah metofora malang buatnya.

P/s: penulis takde idea sambungan. :( btw, esok kita ke Penang! Aha!

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There's Light at the End of the Tunnel pt.5

Are you a keen secret holder? or some sort confidante? Do you feel the burden of knowing things others ought not to know? Well, well, this sort of thing is Foolish Boy's forte, but the real big problem is that, lately, many people had been coming and going, just to express their secrets to Foolish Boy. Being a good listener and adviser can be a bad thing sometimes, especially if there are too many people to listen to and too little space to place the "knowledge". With each passing day, holding on to the zippers on his big mouth, the Foolish Boy keep doing his daily routine, fitting in each time a mishap occurred. He felt the pressure of keeping all the "vital" information to himself. If he wanted to make a havoc of the school, he would been able to do so, with just little whispers here and there. But, little did they knew, their secrets/problems keeper had the biggest problem of all, even bigger what they had been telling him.

Once, someone did asked the Foolish boy, "You had been hearing people problems for so many times, when you'd ever tell yours?"

"I don't like to talk about myself, besides, it's much more fun when hearing people's stories. They'd make a good read," was all the Foolish Boy could reply.

The Fair Lady, one of the best classmates the Foolish Boy had ever had, was very concerned of this behavior of the Foolish Boy's. She needed to confront him.

"Hey, you. What'cha doing?" the Fair Lady called out.

Recognizing the voice, the Foolish Boy instantly replied "Nothing, I was daydreaming,"

"You were wha!? Daydreaming in the daylights? You've got to be kidding!" the Fair Lady exclaimed, her face was initiating a laughter, waiting to burst.

"What is it? I'm sure you came here not to talk about my daydreaming" the Foolish Boy snapped and gave a stern look to her.

"Well, let's see. Do you have problems in the school? Something you could share with me?" the Fair Lady asked.

"Nothing I could think of. Even if I have one, I don't kiss and tell." the Foolish Boy replied, he was sure with this answer she would leave him alone, letting him continue to daydreaming.

"That's no fun when you don't share your problems. How do you relieve your stress? Huh!?" the Fair Lady keeps pestering the Foolish Boy with more questions.

"I listen to peoples' stories, and it entertains me, A LOT," with that the Foolish Boy stood up and head for the door.

"If anyone asked, I'll be "away"," the Foolish Boy smiled and hurriedly disappear.

Unsatisfied with the conversation, the Fair Lady was very determined to know what the Foolish Boy is keeping. But then again, with the Foolish Boy's attitude, the Fair Lady knew quite well, that she'd never get a decent answer or maybe a truthful one, yet. But all in all, she knew, he'd succumbed to her someday later.

And it was already nearing the finals and they were heading for senior year. By the time, The Foolish Boy had made so many friends and it had already be his family, his own family in the school. Though they might not fit the missing pieces, at least the partially fills the gap and loosing ends. It might not be a masterpiece, but you may never know. And, the Foolish Boy's relationship with others, especially the Cool Guy, are going to flourish soon, or so thought the Foolish Boy. A new year is always a new change for everyone, maybe people could change too, the change of heart. May the next year be another amazing year for the Foolish Boy, and oh about the exams, well, let's say he did his best.

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There's Light at the End of the Tunnel pt.4

"The Locus of the Circle can be determined in many ways..." was echoing inside the small room. The Foolish Boy stared blankly at the white board, while his teacher, which was also as round as the drawing on the board, was explaining to the whole class about Circles. The Foolish Boy wasn't really interested in numbers, let alone calculations and formulas.To him, numbers couldn't do the job of explaining something which requires more of the emotional touch. Numbers can't talk. Nor it can express your feelings. Lucky him, he was not the only one who disliked maths. Some of the classmates were also hating it as much the Foolish Boy did. Every time, when it came to the Maths class, the Foolish Boy would put on his half-spirited face on, to mention the class, how he disliked Maths so much. He was more towards, language, verbal and texts. What could be the best way to express your feelings other than pencils and papers? It was, after all, the beginning for another Social Link between the Foolish Boy, the Empress Girl, and the Hermit Girl. Yes, only words were used to form the Social Link between them. Oh, I almost forget. The Empress Lady and the Hermit Girl, was in the same class as the Foolish Boy and the Cool Guy.

"What's with the book, Empress Lady?" the Foolish Boy asked one day, upon setting his eyes on an intriguing book on the Empress Lady's table.

"Oh, it's nothing. Do you want to have a look?" the Empress Lady replied, her face not showing the slightest bit of emotions.

The Foolish Boy nodded as a sign of agreement. He was really curious of what's in the book. People did say you can't be too curious as curiosity killed the cat. But, it's sometimes okay to be the curious cat. You may never knew anything unless you're willing to explore to the unknown, a little bit more. He opened the book, while his heart pumping, racing to keep up to the anxiety level. To his surprise, it was a book with some pencil's or pen's drawing. And there were some words written along with the drawings too. The Foolish Boy didn't know what to say anymore, since he can't comprehend what's the book was all about. He gave a blank look to the Empress Lady, waiting for an explanation for the book, but all the he got was a light nod, indicating, "read on". The Foolish Boy declined, and closed the book. After all, you can't read something you don't really understand, can you?

"Care to elaborate a little more about the book?" the Foolish Boy asked. He was so sure that he would get an answer eventually, if he keeps asking for it.

"Nope,"was all the Empress Lady could reply, and this time with the smile, a smile like a Fox's, full of mysterious and yet it was a warning as well.

Taking the warning seriously, the Foolish Boy backed off and returned to his own place. He was puzzled by the Empress Lady.

"Hey, some deep thinking you got there," a voice came from behind the Foolish Boy. The Foolish Boy turned, and it was the Cool Guy. The Foolish Boy gave a sigh and then smiled.

"I saw you talking to the Empress Lady. What's with her?" the Cool Guy asked. He was puzzled himself.

"Oh, it was nothing." the Foolish Boy said. He didn't want to make it such a big fuss. It was a small misunderstanding.

"I knew her quite well. She goes by with a good reputation here." the Cool Guy whispered to the Foolish Boy. The Foolish Boy was really more intrigued, but again he didn't want to make it such a big fuss. They we're only classmates, and you see classmates weren't the best thing had happened to the Foolish Boy, despite the Cool Guy being his classmates as well.

It's been weeks after the School Representative Election, and the new elected persons were being put off to work. Well, they can't really work on their own, so they would need some underlings to go by under them and the Foolish Boy happened to be one of those who would wanted to be the underlings. Talk about some underlings wannabe. And it also happened to be that, two of his friends are chosen to be in the School Representative, which makes it all more difficult since the Foolish Boy had to choose to work with between the two of his friends. One was the Big Boy, whom the Foolish Boy really loved his company more than anyone else. The other one was the Timid Boy, who he had been friends for quite some time now. And this Timid Boy, despite of his small size, he was emitting this aura of mysteriousness and yet full of it's own smell of serenity. The choosing was hard, since, 4 Bureaus were claiming the right for the Foolish Boy and he had to decide quickly. In the end, he chose the Timid Boy's bureau. And it was the start for an another new Social Link between the Foolish Boy and the Timid Boy. The Timid Boy was the boss and also a friend for the Foolish Boy, yet he would take that advantage to play it cool around the Timid Boy. They're friends. It's what friends do to let the other friend knew that he was happy for them.

It was late August or June evening, or whatever it is, the Timid Boy came into the Foolish Boy room and laid on the bed next to the Foolish Boy. The Timid boy was whispering something, and he was making it real obvious that he didn't want anyone to hear what he has to say. He whispered, and the whisper was so silent that you would be thinking, only air that came out from his mouth. It was very silent, since all of the Foolish Boy room mates were either asleep or outside, doing some jogging.

"W-Wh-What?! Why her?!" The Foolish Boy exclaimed, breaking off the silent.

"I know, I know, but please keep an eye on her for a friend of mine" was all the Timid Boy could answer.

"What I'm supposed to look at?! Her appearance? Her deeds?" the Foolish Boy, confused upon what the Timid Boy had had asked.

"Geez, you sure like to speak so loudly! Keep it down, man. I don't want people to hear this." the Timid Boy was looking around the room. He was making sure that the Laughter Boy was sleeping, so that he can be sure that his secrets were safe.

"You do know that messing around with rules aren't good for your reputation. I'm warning ya. Sooner or later people will know." The Foolish Boy could only warned his friend. He would not do anything to stop it of course, since it was the Timid Boy's sole decision.

"Please, it's not for me, but for a friend of mine." the Timid Boy said, and this time, he was pressing on the words "a friend of mine".

That night, the Foolish Boy started his mission, a mission to help his friend, whose helping someone's secret. And this all was supposed to be secret. What mess was he involving in?

Secrets. Secrets was the last thing that the Foolish Boy would like to involved in.

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There's Light at the End of the Tunnel pt.3

It was the school mid term holidays, when the Foolish Boy decided to really stay in the school for the rest of his schooling days. What had made him to decide such an important decision? After all, the Foolish Boy disliked the school as much as he disliked the Crowd in there. He never ever despised anyone or anything as much as he disliked the school, not since his hatred for the idea of people who are born in such ways are destined to do such ways. It's bare naked ridiculous. How could you believe in such ways? Well, back on to the main story, the Foolish Boy made up his decision mostly based on one most influential person recently in his life. It was all thanks to the Cool Guy, which had changed his perception towards the Crowd forever. But at the same time, he had already made lots of friends already. The Laughter boy was with him from the start, joined by the Happy Boy, and later by the Talkative Boy, The Loud Boy, The Flexi Boy, and The Bigger Boy and not to mention some of the friends from the opposite gender, such as the Mask Girl, and the Happening Girl. And of course, there will always be the Cool Guy. The Foolish Boy was so sure of himself, or is it?

It's time to leave the beloved house once again. The Foolish Boy didn't felt a thing only a surge of happiness blessed with the drops of friendship. He just can't wait to go back to the school and rejoined his friends. What could be more fun when having the time of his life with his friends? Oh really? That doesn't count when you put friends first. :D Anyway, back to the main story. He arrived at his room and like always, with the Laughter Boy, since they lived at the same place., so they would always return home together. It was the start of the new term and rumors spread on how the classes would be reassembled again. Oh boy, poor fellow. Now, the Foolish Boy had to be extra careful not to be placed in the same class as those of the Rough Fellows from the Crowd. He wouldn't want the the Rough Fellows as his classmates, since the rumors were quite true. They are somehow not the group you should really mingle with. After all, when you did something wrong or bad before, people will keep punishing you by talking about it all over again. Not a chance was given to repent all the misdeeds. Humans, they all are very judging. And this no exception for the Foolish Boy, since he was judging hard on the Rough Fellows.

Like always in the story and any other real life, the door to the Foolish Boy's room seemed to be opened so suddenly without a knock or two first. We all hate it when your mother or brother open up the door without knocking up first. But the case was different for the Foolish Boy. He would always welcome those harsh ways of opening his room's door. After all, he could always guess the culprit who opened it. It must had been the Cool Guy, doing his extra chores, since the Foolish Boy and The Cool Guy had become real close, as friends. Well, who can blame someone so spoiled like the Foolish Boy to feel really affectionate and dependent for the Cool Guy, since it was the Cool Guy's fault that the Foolish Boy wanted to stay so much anyway. And the important reason why the Foolish Boy felt so, was that he was lacking the attention from his parents. The Foolish Boy knew something had went missing, and thus he quickly found a drink to quench his thirst for affection. And it happened to be the Cool Guy, who had offered the drink. This drink was purely, the drink of friends. There was nothing more of it, and nothing less of it. You know, the feeling when you loved your brothers and your sisters so much whenever they bought you something or helped you with the school work? That's the genuine feeling that the Foolish Boy felt whenever he's with the Cool Guy.

"Hey you! You're already back!" the Cool Guy said standing at the door. He walked to the Foolish Boy bed and sat on it roughly. The cracking sound was heard throughout the room.

"Yes, I didn't knew you were expecting me," the Foolish Boy said coolly. He looked at the watch on his hands. It was 4.30 p.m

There was an awkward moment of silence.

"You know something! We're in the same class this semester!" the Cool Guy said, with a smile on his face. He was obviously happy with it, and not showing any efforts to hide it.

"Really?! I wasn't expecting that." the Foolish Boy said. He didn't knew what kind of expression should he put up on his face this time.

"We're gonna have so much fun time as classmates!" the Cool Guy replied, and this time looking extremely pleased.

"Really? And what kind of fun is that?" the Foolish Boy said, expecting a satisfying answer.

"Well, I don't really know yet!First things first. You're the president!" the Cool Guy replied and sat up. He walked towards the door and grinned. The grin was a sign of, "I meant it!".

Panic by the sudden election, the Foolish Boy asked "Why me!?" He didn't want any more attention than he already had now.

"Well..." he left the room with another grin.

The Laughter Boy looked at the Foolish Boy. The look was given such as the Foolish Boy was doing the worst mistake ever.

"How could you let him decide things for you?" the Laughter Boy asked, puzzled and obviously dissatisfied with just what had happened.

"Well, I can't really describe it. Just let me be for now." the Foolish Boy replied while hanging back his clothes inside his locker. For the rest of the evening, it was all silence for those two. There was nothing more to be said.

The class of the new semester is starting soon. What could the Foolish Boy do now?

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There's Light at the End of the Tunnel pt.2

Disclaimer:
The stories are true and might differ on what I remembered on certain events. I might not be able to really describe a certain event well, since, my lack of focus on such events, such as the Principal giving speech or so on, where you could find me talking or half asleep during such events. Names are not mention in order to protect the individuals that involves in my story. Thank you.

The next day, the Foolish Boy woke up early, anticipating the arrival of his family. He can't keep it down, he needs to know when his family is gonna be there. Never mind that now though, since the Foolish boy needed to attend the Students' Orientation. The Foolish boy was feeling afraid this time, since he is going to meet some new people that he doesn't know at all. Why did this has to happen to the Foolish Boy? Poor fellow. Pity fellow. Mustering all the courage he barely had left, the Foolish Boy braved trough the crowd and into the Grand Hall of the school. There, he spotted his friend, the Laughter Boy, but they have to be separated since they belong to different homerooms. With a half-dead expression on his face, the Foolish Boy walked towards the President of his homeroom. They barely knew each other. But the genuine smile the Homeroom President gave was embracing him. Later that day, they introduced themselves among the homeroom members, and from there, the Foolish Boy knew that the Homeroom President is called the Happy Boy. The Foolish boy could only smile sheepishly since he was reluctant to talk to anybody.

And the night came when they needed to decide on what to do on some "Stupid Show" for the coming Orientation night. The Foolish Boy gathered with the other homeroom members and was still reluctant to talk to anybody. After all, he was waiting for his parent to come. Until then, the Foolish boy's mouth was sealed. Then it's decided that the Foolish Boy's homeroom need to combine with two other homerooms. But it didn't bother the Foolish boy at all, since he heard that his parents were already there in his school compounds. The Foolish boy felt a little relieved, and will be really relieved when he got to see his parents, but not until later. He needed to face this new crowd. What to do? What to say? Poor boy. Pity boy. And while the Foolish Boy sitting on his chair, not talking to anyone, letting those who can talk decide, a voice came from nowhere.

"Hey you! What's your name?" the Unknown boy said, half smiling, half grinning.

The Foolish boy stared long at the Unknown boy. Is he talking to the Foolish Boy, or asking someone else next to him? The Foolish boy looked left and right, but there's no one there. The devilish smile were still on the Unknown boy's face. A little bit worried and shy, the Foolish Boy opened his mouth for the first time that night.

"My name is @*&$*^@." the Foolish boy replied curtly. He didn't want to talk to anyone right now. He wanted to pass the night, wanting no attention.

"Well, my name is $&#@#*&). Let's help them." the Unknown boy smiled again and this time, the Foolish boy felt secured.

The Foolish boy only nodded, and stand up. They join up with the rest and started to help bit by bit. The Foolish Boy decided to call the Unknown boy, a new name. The Cool Guy. Well, it does suit him, for certain matters count. It was the first time the Foolish Boy had met someone as nice as the Cool Guy. Well, the Foolish Boy, didn't bother much since, it may be the last time they would spoke again. After the practice, the Foolish boy quickly left the Grand Hall, and met up with his parents. He convinced really hard to his parents, to let him go back. But Father was saying no while Mother is getting angrier on the act which the Foolish Boy had pulled. The Foolish boy still failed to convinced them and his parents had decided that he needs to try to stay for a few weeks. If he still can't make it by then, maybe the Foolish boy parents will rethink about it. Well, there's no use for the Foolish Boy to get his hopes as high as the moon, since, he knew deep inside that his parents aren't taking it seriously.

And then came the first day of school. The Foolish Boy woke up as usual, starting to feel a little better and all thanks to the Laughter Boy and the Cool Guy. Especially the Cool Guy. You see, the first time the Foolish Boy stepped inside the school, he disliked the Crowd who's already in the school. Why you may ask? They are self-righteous idiots that are too snobbish for their own good. That's the first impression that sticked on the Foolish Boy's mind until he met the Cool Guy. Since the Cool Guy was one of the Crowd, the Foolish Boy thought of him to be a little bit different from the rest of the Crowd. Well, it's hard to see one of the Crowd to smile at you for the your first day here. Back to the school, it was nothing since he was in the same class with the others in the Other Crowd. Each day passes, and the Foolish Boy started to feel much more better than he was when he first entered the school. And little did the Foolish Boy knew that he might be getting more attention then he was supposed to.Some time later, all was dark again for the Foolish Boy when the Warden decided to mix the Crowd with the Other Crowd rooms, so that each room will have the Crowd and the Other Crowd. Oh well, the Foolish Boy wasn't that afraid anymore, since the Laughter Boy is moving in too.

On one fine evening, the Foolish Boy laid on the bed, thinking nothing but the holidays coming. The door to the Foolish Boy's room opened and there was the Cool Guy, doing his regular chores of visiting other rooms. The Foolish Boy just looked at the Cool Guy and turned away, thinking back of the holidays coming. The Cool Guy, pretending not to see the the Foolish Boy, went ahead to talk to the other room mates.The Foolish Boy's room mate, The Round Boy was a little bit displeased with the Cool Guy's visit, so does the other room mate, the Cold Boy. The Foolish Boy was taking a peek at what the Cool Guy was doing since he can't be too sure what kind of man this Cool Guy is. The Laughter Boy reminded the Foolish Boy to be cautious when making friends. He's right though. You can't be too sure these days. Then bored of what he was doing, the Cool Guy came to the the Foolish Boy's bed and sat on it. The Foolish Boy looked hard at the Cool Guy and said nothing. His mouth was frozen to say anything at all.

"What are you doing on your bed? You should get out and get some sun," the Cool Guy said smiling.

".....I don't feel like it," replied the Foolish Boy. He didn't want any company right now. The Laughter Boy was more than enough to keep him company.

"Oh well, it's your loss then. It's beautiful out there." the Cool Guy said as he sat up and went straight for the door. The Foolish Boy was kind of puzzled by the Cool Guy acts. This is one bothersome guy he had ever met before.

"Thanks, but not today," was all the Foolish Boy could think of.

And from that day and on, the Cool Guy would repeat his visits, doing the same chores by talking to the other room mates and then to the Foolish Boy.

This may be the start of a beautiful friendship.

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There's Light at the End of the Tunnel pt.1

"I never blamed anyone, why should you?" a good friend of mine spoke.

Those words hit me hard on the face and my alter ego that I kept using to pretend I'm just okay.

"Well, I...had to blame someone..." my words clogged at the end of my throat.

I'm ashamed of myself and my deeds to others while I'm still in my school days. I'm a big idiot. The biggest idiot for letting my anger taking control of me, for letting my rage goes uncontrollably, for letting my head set on thinking that it was "him"(someone who used to be my greatest strength to go on with hostel life) to be blamed, and for letting my egos doing all the unwanted attention worth of drama. Flashbacks came and it played inside my inner theater of memories. It had proven so much that I was partly to be blamed as well. I think real deep of what my friend had asked me. He's right. Why would I blame someone who's never really a factor in my fears, who's never been the main character of my drama, and who's I never even bothered before I met him? My friend is right. I shouldn't blamed anyone who had been part of my life, but I should thanked them instead. They made me grow up bit by bit.

Would you guys wanna hear a story about a Foolish boy who had a hard time to fit in into a new crowd and society?

It was 2006, when the Foolish boy went back home, after school, very worried of what might the results be when he checked on the entrance examination into one of the best school around. He partly wished for it.. but never really wanted it anyway. It was the Foolish boy's mother who wanted him to enter the school the most, so that a Bright Man, may be born from the Foolish boy. The Foolish boy had to obey, what else could you do if a mother wants the best for you? It was the worst case scenario for the Foolish boy when the result said that he was accepted to the school. What should the Foolish boy do? Should he tell his mother and obey blindly the wantings of a Mother? There's nothing the Foolish boy could do, since the letters are coming right in front of the door, sooner or later. So, the Foolish boy told his mother, and a smile was carved on the Mother's face. Hopes fly high for the Mother and those dreams are coming true, little by little, since the Foolish boy reluctantly obeys the Mother's wishes.

Two weeks passed. All the equipments for the Foolish boy was already bought a week earlier. the equipments you asked? Well, school equipments for the Foolish boy, so he can learn to live in the Hostel. The Foolish Boy sighed hard, wondering is this really is the right choice. Even though some of the Foolish boy's friends is coming as well, that doesn't make any difference at all to him. It was not really his friends, just some acquaintance from the previous school. But one of his friend, the Laughter Boy was coming as well. So, the Foolish boy wasn't lonely anymore. After all, the Laughter Boy was here with him. The registration was long enough to make any one go withered hearted, so the Foolish boy tried his hard to hide the fact that he was afraid of the whole new world. A world far far away from the Foolish boy's family. The Foolish boy looked at the rented car that his parents used while on the trip to sent the Foolish boy to his new school and hostel. His heart cried out loud, not to let his parents leave him behind, but it was to no avail. Who could hear a heart crying?

That first night, the Foolish boy couldn't sleep. He was restless. He was sleepless. He was anxious. He needed his family back. He needed his bed back. He needed his gaming console back. That night he called his parents asking whether he could turn back, turn back and never ever looked back at this dreaded place he's currently living in.

"Why don't you stay for the night. We'll come tomorrow. I promise." the Foolish boy's Father said.

"I just can't Father! It's not what I imagined of this school." the Foolish boy replied.

Tears started to roll on the Foolish boy's cheeks. He was trying hard to win over his parents. But no. It wasn't working like it always should.

"Why don't you visit the warden? I'll give him a call." Father said to relief the Foolish boy.

"Okay, Father." the Foolish boy replied, the voice was still unsure whether he should be relieved yet or not.

The Foolish boy met with the warden, yet more tears keep coming out from his eyes. He can't just stop. After all the Foolish boy is a spoiled brat to begin with. He never did anything by his own.

He survived the night, alone, and with fright.

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